Yayati - A Father's Cry!

At the outset I wish 'Happy Father's Day' to all fathers. Fathers are unsung heroes of the world of parenting.  In most of the Indian families with the passage of family stages, mother keeps growing in command and stature, often leading to a feeling of redundancy among fathers!  Moreover fathers by nature are less expressive when compared to mothers, which is not desirable for their physical and emotional health. They become loners. But fathers have their own emotions and desires. All these range of fathers' emotions are well portrayed in the play Yayati, written by Girish Karnad, who passed away recently.

Yayati, the King and ancestor of Pandavas of Mahabharat was married to Devayani, the daughter of asura priest Shukracharya. He had relationship with Sharmistha, the maid-servant of Devayani. This infuriates Shukracharya who curses him with premature old age! Yayati could redeem this curse only if someone was ready to exchange his youth with him. Yayati's son Puru (through Sharmistha) agrees to exchange his youth.  Yayati regains his youth and enjoys family life with his two wives for thousand years.  Finally the King accepts his old age and gifts his youth to his son Puru. Yayati crowns Puru as the King, as a reward for his obedience. Karnad's play examines the moment of crisis that Puru's decision sparks, and the dilemma it presents for Yayati, Puru and Puru's young wife.

Is there a Yayati in every senior father of modern times? Certainly yes! And that is why the character of Yayati has stood as a lovable character although centuries have passed. But can there be an young son who is prepared to exchange his youth with the old age of his father? 'Probably no' may be the instant answer! Let us examine the possibilities from all angles.

Even today there are sons and daughters who are ever ready to take good care of their parents. Modern health facilities have enhanced the longevity of seniors' life. Foreign trips/pilgrimages of seniors sponsored by well placed children are quite common. Children helping parents to exchange their old cars with new ones is also not uncommon.  Moreover modern seniors too are clever enough to build savings and assets during their best earning periods. These factors have made 'yayati moment' a reality for our seniors. Of course, not all seniors may be fortunate this way. 

Mahabharath has more messages for modern fathers. Shantanu, one more ancestor of Pandavas was caught in the web of unconditional love with his sweetheart Ganga.  He married Ganga forfeiting his rights to question any of her acts.  Ganga gave birth to seven children, but she drowned all of them to death. Finally when Shantanu mustered courage to question his wife during the birth of their eighth child, Ganga invokes her writ and goes away with the child deserting him. Even in modern life 'Shantanus' are not uncommon who keep mum even on disgraceful acts of their wives.

Shakespeare's drama King Lear, has a great message for modern fathers.  Old King decides to give away his crown and all assets to his daughters.  He calls his daughters one by one and asks them to express their love for him.  The first two clever daughters, Regan and Goneril profusely express their love to their father. But more balanced youngest daughter Cordelia remains modest and refuses to exaggerate her love to her father.  King Lear becomes furious and gives away his crown and all assets to first two daughters, thereby deserting Cordelia.  King Lear also banishes his faithful friend Kent, for publicly standing up for Cordelia.  King of France impressed by Cordelia's honesty marries her.  Soon Regan and Goneril start acting in their true colors deserting the old King.  Cordelia comes with her army to rescue the King, only to be caught as a prisoner, leading to one more Shakespearean tragedy.

Shakespeare's message is very clear.  Modern parents should never part with their assets as long as they live. They should never be tempted by the emotional plots created by their children and give away their assets. 

Father's Day is an occasion for young children to show their love towards their parents.  But it is also a day of caution for seniors to review the position of harsh realities.  A senior father's best companion is his wife. Even a wife can't be a substitute for an intimate friend.  It is worth having at least one such friend. They should pursue hobbies of their interest to keep themselves engaged and remain creative. Physical activity and controlled diet are certainly going to help. Self-sufficiency and independence are the two best friends of old age.
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